The End is Near

I’m running out of options. I have been out of work on disability since September 2015. I applied for SSDI and was denied. I am appealing the decision, but have been told it will likely take over a year for my appeal to be heard.  I applied for public assistance and was told that if I were approved, which isn’t likely, I would only receive $400 a month. My rent alone is $520. I am currently one and half months behind on my rent with February’s rent due in just three days.

I’m depressed and frightened. I don’t know what I am going to do. I can’t face being homeless again, I was homeless for about six months in 2014, and I cannot, will not do it again. I just can’t. I’m walking around like a zombie, hiding my intentions from the few people I do interact with. On the outside I look and act as if nothing is wrong. On the inside I know that I will probably not be alive by this time next month.

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