Yesterday was day seven without a drink. I started a new medication called Naltrexone to help me stop drinking. After four days of taking it I’m too tired to put socks on, much less walk to the liquor store. I wasn’t sure what specifically it did to stop someone from drinking, but apparently it’s extreme fatigue.
It is Wednesday September 12, I have not had a drink since Friday September 7. It feels really weird waking up without a hangover. I started on Naltrexone yesterday and am hoping that it will get my drinking under control. I’ve only taken it once, but it made me very tired and caused me to hallucinate. My big motivation for staying out of inpatient treatment is I have concert tickets next Tuesday. Just 6 more days.
Nearly 48 hours since my last drink and I feel awful. The shakes and withdrawal symptoms have pretty much subsided, but I’m horribly depressed. This is why I have been drinking so heavily, so I didn’t feel these feelings. I’ve been up for 5 hours and am still in my pajamas, curled up under a blanket on the sofa. I have no idea how I am going to get through this day.
I have decided that no matter what happens I am not going to inpatient treatment. If it comes to that I will stop treatment altogether. If I die I die.
My counselor informed me today that if I have a drink between now and the next group on Tuesday she is putting me in inpatient treatment. No more excuses, no more bullshit.
36 hours since my last drink and I feel like I’m going to die. I have a headache, I feel nauseous, my stomach is doing flips, and my hands are shaking so badly that I am having a very hard time holding onto my phone. This is so much worse than the last time I tried stopping.
I have found motivation to quit drinking beyond being placed in inpatient treatment. I want a new guitar.
If I save the money I spend on alcohol I can have this beautiful hand made guitar in less than a year.